Kindness Will Further Your Sobriety

Once we have clarified our morals, truths, and integrities, it is time to look at our actions. Do we come across to others as kind? Are we kind to ourselves? 

Showing kindness is one of the most single, powerful things we can do to promote peace. It will also benefit our sobriety, as when we are kind to others and ourselves, we know a sense of serenity.

When we show kindness, we have a good feeling about ourselves. Being kind feeds our ability to be kind to more people. And, when we show ourselves kindness, we feed our soul, we celebrate ourselves.

I don’t know about you, but when I go out in public to, say, the grocery store, I sometimes listen to parents talk to their children in a very unkind way. That denigrates their being, squashes their spirit.

Sometimes, the words that come out of our mouth are unkind, but we can always apologize for that and make an amend by being kind in the future dealings with people.

How do you display kindness to others? Do you consciously try to be kind, or do you not think about it? You might try thinking about it, as showing kindness will further your sobriety and your emotional strength. It will lead the way to peace. 


Practice Kindness As You Pursue Your Dream

Practicing kindness, being kind to others and ourselves, furthers our journey to living our dream. By showing kindness, we ignite the giving and receiving dance that occurs between two beings when they feel they are in a safe and loving space. That, in turn, fuels the courage to pursue our dream.

The curls of the gate on your right are difficult to see in this small photo, yet they are there and are why the terms curls and kindness are paired together.

You see, as each curl extends itself outward, touching another, it then curls back upon itself. Kindness is like that. When you extend it, it is returned to you in like fashion. 

As each curl joins another, it represents the power you receive from that other, allowing you the courage to pursue your dream. You thrive with the support and kindness from that person.

If you take on the practice of random acts of kindness, then you have arrived at a glorious state. It feels so good to offer kindness to another and to see their face light up with a smile in response to your words or actions. That is the reward you gain, the gift you receive – knowing you helped another fellow human being.

The thing about kindness is that most people are not expecting it, and so when they receive it, they are caught off-guard, displaying in their reaction more of their inner self. That is always so beautiful to witness.

Don’t forget to give yourself kindness. Convert your negative self-talk into kind words uttered for all of your actions taken and words spoken. Make it a habit to show yourself random acts of kindness, for you, too, can use that bolstering. We all can. It feeds our soul.

Today, fill your soul with happiness and courage to pursue your dream. Practice giving and receiving kindness in your life.




Getting Past Hopelessness

This morning we continue on in my book and reach hope. We have now experienced ways for getting past hopelessness.

Ray of Hope

Ray of Hope

“A ray of light across the bars of my being lights my way, instills hope in my heart.” This is the verse that accompanies the photo on the left.

Hopelessness is defined as having no expectation of an event occurring, being despondent. Despondent implies being in very low spirits due to a loss of hope and a sense of futility about continuing our efforts.

Hope, on the other hand, is defined as a feeling that what is wanted will happen, a desire accompanied by expectation. It is hope which we want to cultivate in order to dispel hopelessness.

We have come a long way in our journey and have learned several tools and ways to act and behave that will be useful in combatting hopelessness. We have learned to surrender the pretense that everything is fine with us and we have discussed awakening to awareness of what is going on around and within us.

We have learned to trust in a power greater than ourselves, and to have courage and humility. Ways to treat ourselves with such things as gentleness, kindness, and compassion have been discussed.

We have become honest about ourselves and heave learned to practice willingness, to commit to the journey, to move forward. Finally, we have learned the tremendous tool of how to conduct a self-appraisal. Through that appraisal, we have come to forgiveness of both others and ourselves. Do you see how far we’ve come?

Now, after going through what we have, we have learned to accept ourselves. All of these things in combination provide for us a ray of hope that life can and will get better for us. Hopefully, it already has begun to do so.

We focus on that ray of hope as we work on getting past hopelessness, allowing hope to grow. We take a deep breath, reveling in this new-found hope, and we allow it to blossom.

Today, take a moment to reflect on how far you’ve come, and begin to see the light at the end of the tunnel, the way past hopelessness to sobriety and inner peace.



Inspirational Quote About Life and Grace

As we move forward in my book, our next topic is grace. Today’s inspirational quote about life and grace from the book is “Gently, quietly, an unearned favor of great beauty and pleasure is bestowed upon me.”

Sweep of Grace

Sweep of Grace

There is nothing quite like living in grace. It is a spiritual experience, for me. It is swept upon me quietly, gently, as the quote says, and as the photograph shows.

The thing about grace is that it is unearned, it is a favor. The more you strive for it, the more elusive it is. It is a gift that settles upon you. It just feels like the world is in alignment, that all is right for you.

Webster defines grace as an attractive quality, feature, or manner. It is beauty or charm of form, composition, movement, or expression.

How do you live in grace? Since it is nothing you can originate, since it is bestowed upon you, living the principles of living that we have been discussing will lead to grace.

For example, living with honesty, and with an open and willing heart will lead to grace. So will it if you live with tolerance, compassion, and kindness toward others and yourself.

Live with these qualities today and see if you experience grace, that wonderful veil that descends upon you, gently. Let us know if you experience it and what it feels like for you.


Practice Acts of Kindness

Acts of kindness need to be bestowed not only onto others, but to ourselves, as well. Frequently, we don’t treat ourselves very kindly; we speak in harsh tones, criticize, say mean things. Why do we speak to ourselves with such a lack of kindness? We don’t treat others in such a manner.

Why do we think we can speak to ourselves in disparaging tones, with disparaging words? Perhaps we feel there is something about us that “deserves” such a lack of kindness. But my guess is, we just don’t think about how we are speaking to ourselves. We don’t keep an eye on what we say to our psyche.

Try this: stop and listen the next time you speak to yourself. Did you chide or negate, bully or disparage? I suspect you are not as polite as if you were addressing a friend. Make it a habit to check how you are talking to yourself, a check-in, if you will.

All the while you are checking yourself, look at how you treat others. Is it kind? It doesn’t have to be complicated when we deal with others, yet, is it kind? Practice being kind to others randomly. Every time a kind thought crosses your mind, pass that along to someone. Soon you will feel a lightness associated with your dealings with others.

Do you practice acts of kindness to yourself and others?


Practice Random Acts of Kindness

Curls of Kindness

If this is not the time to be kinder and gentler to each other and to ourselves, when will it be?

Such is the verse that appears as the next topic in the book after Pillar of Strength. The associated image shows a gate with curls of iron throughout. Curls, to me, represent the movement and momentum forward, from one to the next, just as kindness is moved forward, given from one to the next, just as one curl leads into the next.

Kindness does not have to be complicated. It is as simple as offering a smile to someone. It is an act we perform, or words that we say, that help to brighten up another’s day. It could be a compliment, or allowing someone that’s in a hurry to go before us in the grocery store line. It could be paying the toll of the car behind us at the toll gate.

It is a genuine display of love toward another, easily performed. Sometimes it requires a sacrifice on our part; usually it does not. Usually, it merely involves time… our time to extend ourselves to another for a brief moment.  When we practice kindness, it produces a good feeling, makes our spirit soar because we have added to someone’s day in a positive way.

Just as we are kind to others, we need to be reminded to be kind to ourselves. This is achieved by praising ourselves when we complete a task, or do something positive. It involves ceasing our negative self-talk and replacing it with positive words. It means treating ourselves in the same manner as we would treat a stranger in need.

What was the last time you showed kindness to another and what did that look like? How about to yourself?


As the author and award-winning, published photographer of her book of wrought-iron gates and accompanying prose, it is said by others that Carolyn CJ Jones’ book offers inspiration and empowerment to those in transition, to those souls in the corner who struggle. View the video about the book, which is located to the right of this blog. Buy the book from Carolyn’s website  and receive free shipping and your personally autographed copy.


Practice Random Acts of Kindness

Curls of Kindness

curls of kindness“If this is not the time to be kinder and gentler to each other and ourselves, when will it be? “

I recall writing this in my journal one day when I was in angst about the unkind treatment of others that I was witnessing. I was discouraged by this, as well as the lack of kindness I was showing myself.

I didn’t recognize the unkind treatment to myself until years into sobriety, but I did recognize that the ways I treated others could be perceived as unkind.

In the past, I was unable at times to just smile at people, or to offer a kind word, a compliment. It wasn’t that I had unkind thoughts; it was that I was in fear about exposing myself to you. This made me shy.

In later years, I have realized that my behavior could likely be perceived as hostile, haughty, stuck up. Recognizing this opened my eyes to ways I could improve. Still, I had difficulty smiling at you, offering a “hello.”

As my trust in others, the Divine and myself has grown, I have been graced with the ability to smile at you, to offer a word of encouragement, or to tell you your hair looks nice today. I make the conscious choice to practice random acts of kindness. I have experienced great joy when I open up to someone and watch their face light up with appreciation.

It’s as simple as that today, although it has been a process of going through my gates to get to this point. Once I was able to be kind to you, I began to be kinder to myself. My hostile, belittling self-talk has decreased tremendously and most of the time is absent.

So, I ask again. If it is not time to be kinder and gentler to ourselves and others, when will it be?