Dealing With Fear In Sobriety -1 of 3

Here I sit with the topics in the book over, and I am undecided. Do I restart the book right away? That would mean we’d start with fear, and then four difficult emotions and I’m not sure I want to do downer topics before the pulling-yourself-out-of-it topics begin.

Yet again, there may be those who are feeling those emotions in the holiday season  It might be helpful for them to read something about fear, worthlessness, sorrow, and despair.

If I don’t restart the book during the rest of the season, I am in a quandary, for I have no clue what I’d write about. I smile as I say this, because I recognize I have relied upon the book to give me my topics, and my images. Not that that’s a bad thing…

After all, I am writing about the book to convey the journey, the process, in the hopes that it will be useful to us and help bring us to peace.

And as I sit here thinking, my mind wanders to the fact that I am fearful to stray from the book’s topics. You may find what I say stupid, after all, like I have no clue what I’m talking about. Hmmm. The book seems to have started itself on its own accord, so I’m going to follow this thought process of dealing with fear in sobriety. Even those of you not in recovery may find this interesting.

Feeling stupid is something with which I have struggled my entire life, and continue to do so. I try to catch myself when I’m beginning to feel stupid and change my thought pattern. But I still go there initially… As far as not knowing what I’m talking about, I remind myself that all I can do is relay my experiences and general observations about life. It is then up to you to determine what you think or feel about what I have to say.

The thing is, what you think about me is none of my business, as long as I am honest and kind in what I say. And, you might not even have been thinking I was stupid, or that I don’t know what I’m talking about. So, I broke my serenity and peace based upon information that is only my speculation, and that speculation is based on old stories, old experiences.

Hmmm. Let’s look at that. First of all, with the first issue of you thinking me stupid, aren’t I buying into False Evidence Appearing Real? FEAR? As a matter of fact, I am. 🙂 I can now chuckle at myself. “Ah, Jones. Caught again…” lol Suddenly the fear dispels as I realize I got tripped up in fear – again – about nothing that has happened and most likely won’t.

But what about the old stories upon which this feeling of being stupid is based? Join me tomorrow for more about this and dealing with fear in sobriety.

 

 

 

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Comments

  1. I never replied to this, Stan! So sorry for that oversight! I’m glad my post set an example for you; I am hopeful all my posts do that for folks who are reading… 🙂

  2. You liked that, eh? That’s great. There’s more today in part 3. Enjoy!

  3. Now that’s what I call “outing your process”. Thanks for setting such a great example, Carolyn.

    Playful blessings,
    Stan (aka @muz4now)

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